At
some point, a combat vet with PTSD symptoms will give a godlike status
to friends who died in the war. Whether they were good men or
not, the dead will suddenly be raised to a much higher esteem than
the veteran gives himself. They were better men; they would have made
more of their lives if given a chance. Why am I still here and
they are gone? What is my purpose? They could have done it better.
If I would have done something different, they might be alive....
This is natural. PTSD leads to depression, and depression leads to
low self-esteem, which leads to making everyone, especially dead war
friends, seem bigger than life. For many veterans, this can also,
whether they know it or not, be the time to resolve their feelings
about letting dead friends go.
Most combat vets did not
have time to grieve during the war. When someone died they accepted
it, and pushed back sorrow or any emotional reaction. But those emotions
remained inside all those years... and then they are released, veterans
suddenly hit the low point of their lives. A veteran needs to learn
at how to look at the positive side of surviving instead of the negative.
This can be hard when times are rough and the future seems bleak.
Maybe you survived so your children can grow up to do great things.
Maybe you will do great things. If the country collapsed next week,
you wouldn't run around in a panic. You would be able to protect your
family, and hope. You would be a survivor, just like you were in the
war. When dealing with PTSD, the veteran can work through guilt feelings
to a realization that surviving war is something that can be turned
into positive feelings.
It takes time.
